09 August 2009 @ 11:17 pm
[khr] the end complete
notes: A simmering idea, possibly shattered by recent revelations. Desperate love for breaking the beautiful and innocent. A night with Coheed & Cambria. A volatile mix, really.

Huge, huge thanks to [livejournal.com profile] queen_qing for the proofreading. ♥

the end complete
(poor little hound of blood and rank)

Five-thirteen pm, Japan Standard Time. It's a beautiful evening, and Takeshi Yamamoto sits beneath the shade of a sentinel Konara oak, dappled by what little sunlight filters through the serrated edges of the leaves above.

His clothes and hair are still damp from an hour of batting practice, but there is hardly a tremble as one arm stretches languidly across the back of the park bench, as he settles into a posture of barely-feigned ease, tipping his head back to watch the canopy rustle overhead.

So much to think on, but nothing stays still within Takeshi's head -- it's like tracing the spiderweb cracks of gunshot glass, lines and tracers and convergences circling a profoundly still (blank-empty-gone) center. An analogy to shy away from, perhaps, but Takeshi Yamamoto is (has been) older than he looks.

Thoughts circling, skirling, coming again to the weight of Cavallone's hands closing over his own, the cool gravity of dark eyes searching his own, the shape of a mouth bent differently three times, each instance offering only stilted breath and crushing silence.

Weight. Takeshi easily resists the urge to slip a hand along his side, instead curling his palm loosely over his belly.

A melodic whistle then; faint but growing, and there is no smile to cross Takeshi's lips. Legs cross, fingers twitch, the leaves rustle overhead in an unhurried whisper. His scalp itches where the sweat has dried there. A glint of light reflected from convex glass and there is a boy with almost lazy steps slouching down the paved pathway. Takeshi takes in all these things from the corner of his eye, then lets his head drop forward.

As if startled by the sudden motion, the whistling stops, and Shouichi Irie stands uncertain in the sunlight just beyond the old oak's reach.

When Takeshi's smile does come, it's slow but no less sincere for the delay; five fingers of an outstretched hand flutter in a rhythmic wave like spectators at a ball game, and unabashed relief sweeps Irie's features -- no thugs, no prefects, only Yamamoto, the gentle baseball giant who in ignorance wears his humility like a badge of honor.

It is the proper Japanese thing to do, to sit and speak with this not-friend-but-presence at Namimori Junior High, and so Shouichi puts aside a half-dozen unfinished bass riffs and formulae to take a seat, smiling, missing the contraction of pupils at the way Shouichi's smile brightens in the absence of all the things he doesn't

(will never)


And it goes well, as conversations can between two people who might or might not be mostly strangers, a low-key back and forth on whatever comes to mind, moving from the mundane talk of clubs and classwork to a stunning impromptu elegy for Hideto Matsumoto of the electric guitar to a ten-minute rant on why Sadaharu Oh is the best thing to have ever come from Nippon Professional Baseball. For all the awkward pauses, the moments where either voice suddenly falters like it's unsure of its place in this conversation or this quiet park, it is not an unpleasant meeting.

Overhead, the leaves whisper. To the west, the sun is slipping beyond the jagged horizon of Namimori proper, the school bell tolling six like a dirge. It's enough to make Takeshi flinch, and Shouichi tips his head, blinking as if coming out of a reverie.

"It's late," Takeshi chuckles and passes a hand over his eyes, Cavallone's solemn gaze surging to the front of his mind once more. He's on his feet before he knows it, slinging his schoolbag over one shoulder. "But hey, it was good, to talk for a while, huh?"

He hears but doesn't register Shouichi's answer as he moves towards the path, passing behind the shaded bench, and Shouichi is bending forward to tighten his shoelaces and to Takeshi it's like there's all the time in the world to contemplate opportunity and destiny because time is crawling.

All the time in the world, really, to reach beneath his open jacket


and it's his father he's thinking of, the father that will inevitably die in this boy's future at the hands of a rival mafia thug as he sights in on the space where soft brown hair curls at the base of Shouichi Irie's neck, his hand lifting just a fraction and to Takeshi's ears the shot is louder than the crack of rawhide against a rock-maple bat despite the awkward silencer, the recoil almost enough to drive the pistol from his grasp.

He hopes it is quick. He hopes it is painless.

Shouichi's body slumps forward, and the blood spattering his knees and uncurled palms seems too dark in the shade.

One deep breath, and then another, and Takeshi knows that the time to set aside games forever has come. He slides the pistol back inside his Eagles jacket and adjusts the strap of his bag, then moves toward the path with something resembling purpose.

Tomorrow he will face Tsuna, who he knows will not understand this for years to come, if ever. Tonight, as an assassin of the Vongola family, he will face Dino Cavallone, whose sudden, uncharacteristic silence he can only now comprehend. Tonight he will answer silence with a weighted silence of his own, and leave to Dino the unpleasant details of procedures he's sure will someday be his, as well.

He'll be quick, of course; his father will surely be waiting.

Together, they will make chazuke.

09August 2009

Another one of those things that was far more potent in my head. :| First real endeavor into the KHR fic arena; hopefully, it's only the beginning.
Current Music: Coheed & Cambria - Ten Speed (Of Gods' Blood and Burial)
Current Mood: aggravated
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[identity profile] shadows-in-mind.livejournal.com on August 10th, 2009 08:22 am (UTC)
It is lovely, bb. Kind of gripping because you know what's coming and it's not going to pretty. :| I'm sorry Souichi, but I kind of feel bad for Yamamoto. XD;
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[identity profile] arclights.livejournal.com on August 10th, 2009 04:25 pm (UTC)
D'aww, thank you love. :3 Yeah, it's Yamamoto (and, uh, Dino, because goddamn he's too old for this shit) I'm feeling the hurt for Yamamoto. What a hideous coming-of-age, and a statement about the life he'll have, a decade down the line.

Honestly, I'm really fascinated by the idea of Yamamoto shifting from the goofy baseball kid to a sleek mafia killer. Okay, so it's the fact that it'd be ugly and you know how I am uh -- D-do want. :
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[identity profile] queen-qing.livejournal.com on August 10th, 2009 10:16 am (UTC)
Bb you know what I think of this fic, and it's all manners of awesome and wonderful ♥

So here, have the above icon.
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[identity profile] arclights.livejournal.com on August 10th, 2009 04:19 pm (UTC)
Yeah but you know how I love validation. Especially hanging out with the retardedly talented folks we do. ♥

/puts it in gently
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[identity profile] saying-sooth.livejournal.com on August 10th, 2009 11:25 am (UTC)
I like it. =) What I enjoyed most was how you described the conversation between Irie and Yamamoto without a single piece of dialogue. Also, I like how your sentences are incredibly long but don't seem that way, and how you vary long and short sentences (dunno if that's intended or accidental, but it's good).

I'm wondering if all the Dino references come from an earlier piece? Seems that way, but since you say it's your first real endeavor into KHR fanfiction, it just might be that you haven't provided enough background. I would definitely like to know more about how Dino comes into this.

Btw, 4th paragraph, I assume skirling = swirling?

Haha, I know the feeling of canon plot destroying past plot-bunnies. Let's say this happened in a parallel world?

I look forward to more writing in the future. ^__^ Sorry if the comment is choppy, I need to eat dinner now...
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[identity profile] arclights.livejournal.com on August 10th, 2009 04:16 pm (UTC)
I'm glad you do! (And, honestly, throwing a conversation in there and just glossing over the whole thing is the one move I was least confident about. Glad to know it paid off for someone!) Sentence length is a conscious thing -- it's one of those pieces of advice I gleaned about writing years and years ago that always seemed like a Very True thing and stuck. Not that I'm counting syllables, but if it gets to monotonous, I know. ♥

Honestly, the Dino references were meant as little more than allusion to the fact that Dino was massively enabling Yamamoto here to go commit his very first murder and that, tastefully, he was feeling quite solemn about the whole thing. Obviously this didn't work out quite as well as I was hoping, but we win some and lose some. :3

Actually, skirling is not a typo (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/skirling).

Amano would love to put this one over on me - I can feel it. Plot's gone quite a jump from 'you really need to kill this guy as soon as you can' to 'somehow the way the cosmic circle has been laid out today only has given us what we need to defeat this grinning bastard and haha you needed me.' This is what happens when people write slowly. :<

Thanks for the feedback! \o/
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[identity profile] saying-sooth.livejournal.com on August 11th, 2009 12:27 am (UTC)
Sentence length is a conscious thing for me as well, but I didn't want to assume. ^^

Hehe, this fic was a lot more win than lose, so good job~ Another part that I loved - Yamamoto committing the act for his father. T__T

Well, time to learn a new word. My rather informal rule about word choice when writing - I try not to include "obscure" words, obscure meaning ones I haven't read in another book (and I mean book, not fanfic). It's served me pretty well so far. =) I am not trying to imply anything about your diction, I am only sharing my own views (i.e. please don't get offended @__@).

Yeah, the plot is being convoluted and yet incredibly plausible. I hate writing slowly. >__< I wish I could've dashed off a drabble for each chapter and the state of the world as it seemed to be at that moment, but too bad.

Haha, whenever I get off my lazy ass and actually give feedback, my comments are ridiculously long (only for fic though, for art I gush like everyone else). I figure, if I like this piece enough to actually comment, I might as well put some effort into it.
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[identity profile] arclights.livejournal.com on August 11th, 2009 04:54 am (UTC)
Very understandable. :3c

That's good! And yeah -- Yamamoto strikes me as very family-oriented. It definitely encompasses the Vongola and their camp, but I don't think he'll ever forget his papa. Learning that his dad was a mafia hit, I imagine, was just devastating. D:

Delicious vocab! I don't tend to go overboard (or at least I hope it's not seen as that way) -- I'm not by any means one of those people who'll throw open the thesaurus and try to wow people with arcane words -- well, actually, I tend to pick up (and utilize) vocabulary in the same fashion? That one, I think, was one of Steven Erikson's 'new words for Miri' moments. At least I'm not stuffing words like magnanimous everywhere I can think to fit it. :D If I do tend to go with something particularly uncommon (and generally when I'm abusing grammar), it's generally for a purpose -- cadence/flow, most often -- and it's never anything really integral to a person's understanding of a story. I'm writing fic; I'm not trying to make anyone feel stupid. (And no offense taken -- different strokes for different folks, and all is well.♥)

Amano certainly raised an interesting scenario with recent additions and Byakuran's "power" -- I'm definitely interested in playing with those a bit. :3 It's almost like giving a sort of free reign on canon-sanctioned AUs, in a way -- or maybe I'm just the kind of person who'll take any amount of free reign I can get. xD;

Ah, but I appreciate it so much! Detailed reviews (and oh god, crit when it comes in *___*) is some of the most gratifying stuff on the planet, as far as I'm concerned.

Edited 2009-08-11 04:55 am (UTC)
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[identity profile] saying-sooth.livejournal.com on August 11th, 2009 10:41 am (UTC)
T__T I am exceedingly sad whenever I think of Yama-papa's death. If I'm understanding what Amano is saying, Tsuna and company can only defeat Byakuran in this world - meaning, Yama-papa stays dead? >__<

Lawlz, magnanimous. But I think your diction is awesome, and I totally understand your way of thinking.

Amano is certainly lending canon-backing to a variety of new worlds, which is very gladly received. ^^

Haha, I do it with the hope that in time, someone might do the same for my writing. And because I like analyzing fic. =) Most people only read something once, but reading it twice, as I do when I'm writing these reviews, really broadens the appreciation I have for the writing. Also, these reviews tend to spawn interesting conversations, such as the one we're having here. ^__^
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